I’m late to the party but I’ve finally started watching series 3 of Malory Towers. I will try to make this more than a lengthy summary of what happens in the first two episodes but I am promising nothing.

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Episode one – new arrivals

There is a new girl, or new girls pretty much every term at Malory Towers and from the book we know that the third form’s newcomers are Wilhelmina (Bill) Robinson and Zerelda Brass. I had already read that Zerelda doesn’t appear, so let’s dive in and see who and what do appear.

Book readers will remember, I’m sure, that Darrell’s father drives her and Zerelda to school for the start of term. The episode begins with a beautiful vintage car driving through some lovely countryside, with the sound of girls’ voices played over it. At first I thought that Darrell was talking to Felicity (forgetting she doesn’t join until Darrell’s in her fourth year) but it’s Mary-Lou and Gwen, and it’s Gwen’s father driving.

Bill, on Thunder, passes them so we get our first glimpse of her – and of Gwen’s outfit. Has she forgotten she’s a school girl? What on earth is she wearing?

The outfit is somewhat explained when the new teacher – Miss Johnson – mistakes Gwen for a sixth-former – mimicking Zerelda being mistaken for a teacher. The other girls remark that Miss Johnson is someone new for Gwen to go all silly over which is a nice reference to the books.

The main storylines of this episode

First up we have a lot of Gwen-centred story. Mr Lacey is about to join the board of governors for the school, making Gwen think even more of herself and throw her weight around quite unbearably. I did wonder if she was also doing so prematurely, as it would have been deserved if it fell through at the last minute, but no, it seems as if he is on the board.

There is a little of the interesting relationship between Gwen and her father – but nothing quite as cold and mean from her father as there was last series. He does say oh, to have had a son in Gwen’s earshot which is pretty rude and you can tell from her face it has upset her. He is slightly kinder in his later conversation with her, urging her to take advantage of what Malory Towers has to offer…. become someone the school can be proud of, which is somewhat similar to Miss Grayling’s message to her girls.

Then there is Bill. Bill’s horse obsession is even more apparent on screen than in the books. She takes a horse blanket to bed so she can smell Thunder’s horsy smell, and is in trouble for how much time she spends in the stables from the first day of lessons.

This is bulked out by the idea there may be horse thieves around (Ron, who now works in the stables as well as the gardens, has been hearing lots of odd noises around the stables) – I can see her getting into a LOT of trouble as it seems inevitable that she’ll be running off to the stables at all hours of the day and night to make sure that her beloved Thunder is OK.

Also added is Bill being behind the other girls, so far behind that Miss Johnson wants her to drop down to the second form – meaning that Thunder would have to go home. This is resolved (with Darrell’s help) by Bill getting extra tuition, but that leaves her with even less time to see Thunder!

Things that I liked:

Irene forgets/loses her health certificate much to Matron’s irritation – another lovely nod to the books. Sadly we don’t get to see where she had put it for safekeeping.

Bill’s line give me a horse over horse-power any day.

Bill is mistaken for her own groom (it is assumed that a groom will ride the horse over and Wilhelmina will come in a car) and this is quite a funny scene as the girls are asking her if the Wilhelmina is hoity-toity.

Bill going to see Miss Grayling in her pyjamas as Matron told her she had to change out of her jodhpurs and wouldn’t listen to her explaining that her trunk hadn’t arrived yet.

Gwen getting a bit of comeuppance when Darrell and Bill shout boo at her (not knowing it’s her) and make her fall into the manure pile – and Mr Lacey’s obvious amusement at it too.

Darrell’s word blindness gets brought up again – so the writer’s have not forgotten about it! (Though I suspect it’s just so she and Bill can have tutoring together and go up against Miss Johnson.)

Things I didn’t quite understand

Just like in the books, Sally has the mumps and will miss the first few weeks of term. In the book this allows Darrell to spend more time with Alicia and be led into bad habits and behaviours, and sets up for Alicia and Sally to be fighting for Darrell’s friendship later on. Alicia doesn’t appear in this series so I’m wondering where they’re going to take this – it seems odd to not have Sally back unless it is actually going to be a bigger part of the plot.

Gwen – well, I rarely understand Gwen. The series has done its best to make her both likeable, pitiable and plaine evil, and she continues to seesaw quite a lot here.

She immediately goes up against Bill – what have you done to your hair? and sneaks her horse blanket into the wash so that it loses the smell.

Yet she also tries to go for head of form, seeming to believe that there will be girls willing to nominate her despite her all her previous behaviours. The rest of the girls are nice and they seem pretty willing to forgive – but I can’t see them wanting Gwen in charge of them.

Miss Johnson, in general. She is not the horsey teacher of the books. (I always felt this was a good parallel  – in the book Bill and Miss Johnson butted heads, and Bill thought that Miss Johnson should be more understanding, as a fellow horse-lover. But in the end Miss Johnson saves Thunder and earns Bill’s real respect and admiration. A non-horsey teacher feels a bit different).

I also couldn’t work out her motivations. From her facial expressions it looked as if she was enjoying punishing Bill and the idea of putting her into a lower form – there were several rather evil smiles. Yet she offered to give the extra tuition – yes she was put on the spot a little by Darrell, and in front of Miss Grayling too, but it seemed a genuine and kind offer.

All I can think of is that she wants to keep Bill away from the stables – perhaps she (or someone she knows) is hiding out/hiding something at the stables. If she can’t keep Bill away from them rules then she’ll have Thunder sent home to keep Bill away?

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Episode two – the trials

I see trials and I think witches. But no, it’s lacrosse.

The main storylines

There is a mystery surrounding Mary-Lou. Suddenly she is wearing scarves and jumpers, despite the warm weather and seems preoccupied and is avoiding the other girls.

And, as per the title, the third year lacrosse trials are scheduled. Darrell is captain so she has some responsibility but Miss Johnson is in charge.

What looks like a third, minor storyline actually turns out to be part of one of the above, and that is Ron finding a girls’ uniform dress buried in the vegetable patch.

Things I liked

Gwen being true to form and hiding the lacrosse balls in an attempt to derail the trials.

The little look between Miss Grayling and Matron about how [periods] stop around my age – I’ve no doubt that the target audience would not understand it, but older woman will!

Things I didn’t understand

Obviously I never went to a 1950s boarding school but I didn’t really get the plan to trick Gwen into signing the trials sign-up sheet.

Firstly, it seemed to me like all she had to do was say she was tricked into putting her name down and she doesn’t want to take part. (She does, actually say this, but Miss Johnson, continuing to be weird, won’t accept that.)

If that fails, then Gwen is more than capable of faking an injury or turning up but performing badly.

Miss Johnson’s behaviour continues to be bizarre. She gives the girls five minutes to find the lacrosse balls (blaming Darrell, as the captain, as she is supposed to have everything organised) and then when they do find them she tells them it’s too late and the trials are off, there isn’t enough time. Surely however much time she set aside minus the 5-6 minutes is enough? She then agrees to hold them later, but not all the girls who signed up turn up – Gwen and Mary-Lou are still talking to Ron. She refuses to let them try out as not all the girls are there – but what does it matter? The girls who don’t turn up don’t get to try out and don’t make the team. Why punish all the rest of the girls?

I have, since watching, remembered a comment I had seen about Miss Johnson that could explain it all – I won’t say what it is here as it would be a bit of a spoiler (assuming anyone is slower to have watched these episodes than me!), but I will be keeping it in mind as I watch.

Why Mary-Lou was using Gwen’s hairbrush in one scene – deliberately as far as the writers were concerned, as Gwen catches her.

Things I am ambivalent about

The reveal/resolution of Mary-Lou’s problem.

I think it is important to have periods be something we can talk about openly – and that boys/men are aware of them. There’s no need in this day and age for people to be squeamish or embarrassed. So there is a place for realistic period-related storylines in TV programmes aimed at adolescent (and preadolescent) girls.

Saying that, I thought the way it was included was ridiculously heavy-handed. Mary-Lou, out of nowhere, develops plague-like spots on the back of her neck and is completely unaware of periods despite being close to her gran who appeared to be a modern woman (relative to the times).

Gwen, on her wild pendulum of behaviour, is extremely kind when she figures out what is going on and explains things to Mary-Lou. Strangely she both calls it “the curse”, and also reassures Mary-Lou that it’s all super-easy and nothing to ever worry about. Slightly conflicting, no?

The worst part is that Ron – a teenage boy – wanders past their discussion and casually asks if its Mary-Lou’s monthlies. He found the blood-stained dress so an enlightened young man may make that leap of logic, but would a 1940s teenage boy really start talking about periods to the school girls of the school he works at? As above, I’m all for men being comfortable with buying period products for their any women in their lives, but this just strikes me as SO unlikely for the time period (no pun intended) that it really jarred.

We are also supposed (I assume) to laugh along with the girls at Matron for being so embarrassed herself when she’s asked to deliver a lecture on biology and anatomy – it’s not explicitly said but it’s obvious it’s supposed to be about periods. It was actually embarrassing, though, to see a grown woman – a matron, who cares for teenage girl’s health – no less, give a lecture that amounted to tadpoles turn into frogs, girls turn into women, and hormones… cause unidentified “changes” to the body.

The actual lacrosse playing was fairly poor. The books always made it sound so fast-paced and exciting (even the trials). On screen Gwen stands with the ball at her feet while her opponent (an un-named, non-speaking part) moves side to side behind Darrell, apparently held off by Darrell’s tiny sidesteps. Just go round her! This goes on for long enough for Darrell to have a conversation with Gwen before any attempt to get the ball is made. It may be that until the ball is picked up it’s not in play and couldn’t be grabbed by the opponent but it just looked so silly.

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Completely unrelated to anything else I just wanted to share this shot of the gardens as they’re beautiful – the series uses lots of really lovely views of the school and grounds between scenes. In real-life this is Hartland Abbey in Devon.